Biological Father vs. Adoptive Father

My parents divorced when I was six years old. My father cheated on my mother so she left him. Two years later she remarried and her husband adopted my brother and I. He has been a good father to us, and we have always considered him to be our dad.¬† I have not seen my biological father (“real dad”) since the day he left. For many years he did not keep in touch with anyone. He never helped my mom in any way once he left. Men cannot get away with that as easily in today’s world, but apparently he left the state and that was that.

When I was 18 my mother asked me what I would do if my “real dad” came in town and wanted to see me. I told her that I had no desire to see him. He didn’t want me when I was young and now he is a complete stranger. What I didn’t know at the time is that he really was in town then and he wanted her to ask me that question hypothetically. She didn’t tell me this until years later. So he left and didn’t bother us.

Life went on. I got married, had children and moved to Texas. My “real dad” wrote a six page letter to me and sent it to my mom and asked her to send it to me. Basically this letter was a confession of many things he has done wrong in his life and an apology for not being the father he should have been. He included his phone number and email address with hopes that we could stay in touch.

I no longer held a grudge against him. I let go of that years before. His letter seemed sincere and I planned on staying in touch with him, beginning with email. I shared the letter with my husband who didn’t like it and didn’t trust him, especially after reading the kind of life he had led. My husband took it upon himself to email him back and put an end to the communication between us, without my consent or permission. I was pretty upset by his actions because it was not his place.

Apparently my adopted father doesn’t like any of it either. He seems bothered by the fact that I would even consider talking to my biological father. On one hand I can understand his feelings because he has always been there for me and has been a good father for over 40 years. But on the other hand he should know that he cannot be replaced.

My biological father gave up his right to be my dad. He walked away and let someone else take his place and didn’t bother to come around for 12 years. He has regrets and just wants a chance to get to know his children he walked away from. As a Christian I feel I need to forgive him and move forward. He is a complete stranger to me. If he were to die I would kick myself for not reaching out to him.

He has retired now and moved back to the state where we used to live. Most of my family lives there. I visit once every year and plan to see him on my next trip. My mother feels that we should keep it from my dad because it will bother him. I guess that is best but I don’t like being sneaky and lying.

My brother does not know that he has retired and moved back. I’m really hoping to talk my brother in to going to see him with me. He is still holding a grudge against him for leaving. My mom is afraid if I tell my brother about it that he will tell our dad. This all seems ridiculous to me. We are all adults here. I wish we could all act like it.

forgive others


The Things We Do For Family

Sometimes we surprise ourselves at what we will do for those we love. Even better when we surprise our loved ones by what we will do for them.

I am not an animal lover per se, but I am not an animal hater either. I’m just one of those people who would choose¬†not to have a pet. I have two children and a husband so I do not really need one more living thing to take care of.

Five years ago we decided to get a dog for the girls. Our intention was to get it for our youngest child who has health and social issues. However, the dog immediately bonded with our older daughter. This dog was really a good fit for our family.


My girls were surprised at how I would play with the dog and take her on walks when they were too busy. I love that. They think they know me and I blow their little minds!



Last year I told my younger daughter that we should get her a dog that is hers. She couldn’t believe it. She never thought we would have even one dog and now I’m suggesting that we get another. Yeah, anyone who knows me knows that is YUGE! Again, if it were up to me I wouldn’t have a pet, but the girls are both animal lovers and I really think it will be good for my younger daughter.

So right now we are shopping for another dog. Praying that we get another one that is perfect for our family. Yes, I actually do pray about this. A pet is a big deal, especially for me, so I want one that is a good fit for us.




Girls Trip, December 2017

In mid December I flew to Cincinnati airport to meet my mother-in-law and sister-in-law for a mini vacation together to see the life-sized Noah’s Ark and Creation Museum. I have wanted to see the Creation Museum for many years, and once I heard about the Ark being built I knew I had to get there. If you have never been I highly recommend them both. They recommend one full day for the Ark and two full days for the Creation Museum and that is exactly what we did. Both are so well done, you will not be disappointed.



To see the Ark up close was amazing. It is the size of the original Ark in the Bible so you really get a feel for what it was like. To think about Noah and his family in there with all of those animals is really incredible. Those women deserve an extra crown for that. I’m not sure how well I would have handled it. My husband says if I had been on the Ark we would have fewer animal species today. He is probably right!

Look at this thing up close! It truly is mind blowing that Noah’s family built an Ark this size.


Yeah, we look pretty small next to this grandiose vessel.


That’s me and my mother-in-law. I like to keep it classy when taking pics.

Inside is beautiful and amazing, but also practical and well thought out. They show animals that would have been on the Ark and possible ways they would be fed and cared for. Here are just a few. They estimated that each family member would feed and care for 85 animals per day. Can you imagine!




Just a few animals. We took too many pics to put them all here. They were very real looking though.

Noah talked and the bird on the desk moved its head the whole time. Very well done.


Noah and the dove.


The world is deceived.


One of the 7 D’s of Deception.


On to The Creation Museum.


Adam and the animals.



Adam and Eve.


God’s Word.


Methuselah. He talked and moved as well.


Noah and one of his sons building the Ark.




Outside was decorated for Christmas and it was beautiful. These pics do not do it justice as these are from my phone. Here are just a few.




It was difficult to decide which pictures to include in this post. I tried to choose those that might pique your interest. We didn’t have a lot of time to do other sightseeing but we just stumbled on this spot by the Ohio River. I bet it is beautiful in the summer and fall.


We were on the Kentucky side of the river, but on the other side is Ohio.


We kept seeing a lot of these white trees.

I hope you enjoyed your peek into the Ark and Creation Museum. Hopefully you will one day be able to visit it for yourself.

Holidays and Family

The holidays are right around the corner, which gets me to thinking about family. I miss seeing family regularly but it just seems to multiply during the holidays. I want to share Thanksgiving and Christmas with my parents and my brother or split the holidays between my family and my in-laws.

Thankful for family

We have been away from both families for 20 years now. Oh wow, that just hit me. I didn’t actually realize it was 20 years until I thought about what year we moved to Texas. If someone would have told me when we moved here that we would be here 20 years I would have laughed in their face and refused to believe it.


God knows my heart on this subject. I have an increasing desire to move close to my parents. I want to be there for them as they are aging. I don’t know how much time we have left together and I don’t want to spend it 700 miles apart. Even worse, we are 1,200 miles from my husband’s family. Moving close to my family would cut these miles in half. Sounds like a win-win to me!

Every moment matters

Right now all I can do is pray about it as my husband and I cannot agree on where to move. We both want to get out of Texas but cannot agree past that.


I am going to try to add some new activities to our Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations this year. Now that my girls are older it just doesn’t feel the same with just the four of us. So since no other family will be here on these holidays I want to add some things to help make them even more memorable. I will have to make a post about any activities that were a success.